Death Is Nothing At All

It has been over one year since I lost my grandmother. I have lost others before but hers is still so raw. 

I find I get more emotional over her passing than others. I find myself emotional and crying at odd times. There doesn't seem to be a particular event that triggers these episodes, just these feelings that surfaces within me that demands to be felt. I could be driving or cooking and tears will well in my eyes. 

'Just give it time.' So they say. Time doesn't stop the feelings of loss and grief. I just get better at handling them.

I'm a firm believer that everything happens as they should be, I do believe that. Though I do find myself asking at times 'why?' Why couldn't she stay just a little longer to meet her sweet second great grandchildren? Why do we have to love someone so much it hurts? Just, why?

Then after I release some of this emotion anguish, the practical side of me answers all the questions one by one until I see reason again. Emotional crises averted. 

The greatest comforts I get when I go through one of these emotional episodes is she is pain free, I'm sure she is as youthful and nimble as ever. Probably being the social butterfly she once was and catching up with all her loved ones.

I have no doubt I will see her again one day. I know she is with me, I  can feel it within  the fibre of my being. Though her physical maybe gone, we are still connected by that unbreakable emotional tether.  The otherside doesn't seem as scary now that she is there. Until that day...

Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?