To my children... I'm only human but I'm trying...
It has been a long time since my last post. I thought I could be super women and do everything I use to do, plus raise two little human beings. I have to humbling admit, I can't. the weirdest thing is I don't mind, anymore. It took me a while to get use to the feeling, I got to the point where I was hating myself for not being able to stay up late and do things I use too. But I had to take a long hard look at myself. When I did, I realised I became my worst fan. I was applying so much pressure on me, trying to be the best mum, partner, starting a small business, still writing and the list goes on. I had to accept that some people can do it, but I can't. Not that I never will. I will do those things again, slowing chipping away at them. My passion has shifted for this season in my life. For the time being I am relishing the littleness of my little humans and being very present. I mean who wouldn't want to be with these two cuties :)
Out of the things I started and struggled to keep on top off, I was able to stick to keeping a diary. Before I gave birth to my first born in 2017, Anakin (yes we are fans of Star Wars) I started jotting down things I wanted for him, things I learnt that helped me and just anything that came to mind.
When he was born it evolved to be things he did that made me feel like a mum. I committed to writing at least one sentence everyday or at best every three days on things that he did that made me smile.
I also used the journal to scrapbook his art from childcare, to love notes from his dad to me.
My journal, I now see as a bespoke gift for my children to read back and get an insight on me. My thoughts, struggles and most of all the love I have for them.
When Aurora came along in 2019, I tried to keep two journals for each child. It became too hard, so I merged them together. This would also force them to share, LOL. I go between writing in first and third person, depending on my mood.
I now have two A4 books that I cherish and will add to them as we go.
My husband always said I had 'hard to read writing', I have a habit of writing so fast and sometimes in my short hand that I think he may be right. (But don't tell him that.) Then since Australia was hit with horrible fires this Summer, I realised if I was in a burning building on my own the things I would save were these two note books.
So for insurance I have decided to blog it as well.
Today Anakin (2 years) was trying to say Paper Back Apps, but he said Paper Back Ass. I laughed so hard, he laughed too. Though I suspect he was just trying to join my laughter. So I went from laughing about 'ass', to laughing at him trying to fit in and then a stitch.
Aurora (9 months) has shown she has a keen ear for music. When she hears a song she starts to bounce and puts her little arms in the air and then open and closes her hands and does so with a big smile.
Stay tuned for the fun/cute show that is Anakin & Aurora + Mum as the side act.
When he was born it evolved to be things he did that made me feel like a mum. I committed to writing at least one sentence everyday or at best every three days on things that he did that made me smile.
I also used the journal to scrapbook his art from childcare, to love notes from his dad to me.
My journal, I now see as a bespoke gift for my children to read back and get an insight on me. My thoughts, struggles and most of all the love I have for them.
When Aurora came along in 2019, I tried to keep two journals for each child. It became too hard, so I merged them together. This would also force them to share, LOL. I go between writing in first and third person, depending on my mood.
My husband always said I had 'hard to read writing', I have a habit of writing so fast and sometimes in my short hand that I think he may be right. (But don't tell him that.) Then since Australia was hit with horrible fires this Summer, I realised if I was in a burning building on my own the things I would save were these two note books.
So for insurance I have decided to blog it as well.
Today Anakin (2 years) was trying to say Paper Back Apps, but he said Paper Back Ass. I laughed so hard, he laughed too. Though I suspect he was just trying to join my laughter. So I went from laughing about 'ass', to laughing at him trying to fit in and then a stitch.
Aurora (9 months) has shown she has a keen ear for music. When she hears a song she starts to bounce and puts her little arms in the air and then open and closes her hands and does so with a big smile.
Stay tuned for the fun/cute show that is Anakin & Aurora + Mum as the side act.
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